Cindy (00:00)
Hey everybody, it's Cindy Donaldson and welcome to the Cindy Donaldson show. If you are ready to up level your life, figure out what's holding you back, start checking that shit off your bucket list. Maybe find a better job, maybe find a better partner, or just learn how to live in the moment and enjoy your life. You're in the right place. So yesterday I posted something on social media about how you shouldn't play small.
And I got so many DMs on it in that I needed to hear this today. So I thought it was the perfect thing to do for my podcast. And the video post, mean, the social post kind of went like this, you know, put on an outfit that makes you feel great. Put on the earrings, put on the lipstick, walk into the room, kind of cocky, but incredibly confident and let them wonder. Let them wonder like what's going on in your head.
let them wonder why you're walking in so confident. And I know you've all been there. You've been at an event. And I've talked about this before, that high energy. You're in an event and you see somebody walk in and there's just this people stop and look at them, not because of their outfit, not because of who they are. They might, they may not even know who they are, but because of that air of energy.
Let them wonder. Let them wonder what's going on. And this all comes back to playing small. And I met with a client yesterday who's trying to blow up a new business. They're sitting on a goal mine, but they're playing small. Their marketing is small. Their conversations are not with the right people. Like they need to be charging a six figure thing and they're not. They're charging an hourly rate.
And they're serving a population that is great, but that population that they're serving could all just be given away as free content. And what they should be charging for is a lot more. they're again, targeting the wrong person. So we're revamping all of their marketing. We've revamping all their communications. So they go from here up to here. And if you're listening to this down low versus up high. So that's what I mean by playing small. And I've been there.
And it gets in your head a lot. You know, I've, I've shared on here about my first six figure deal when I was going to offer it for like, I don't know, 10 or $20,000. And my business coach at the time was kicking me under the table. She's coming on the podcast next month. She was actually supposed to be in the lineup for today, but she came down with bronchitis and we can't have Robin or our famous kick me under the table girl with bronchitis on the podcast. So, um, but she's really the one that taught me.
about this whole small versus big thing. And you're really doing yourself a disservice when you play small, when you undervalue who you are. And is it scary? Yes. It's scary to toss out a really big number, but I can promise you that people will always pay for what they deem valuable. They always will. So I was listening to some creators, some sales guru ⁓ on TikTok. And again,
I forgot the person's name. So I apologize if that person tends to listen to my podcast. But ⁓ he was talking about like when it comes to sales, you know, and somebody comes back and, just like, well, you're too expensive. And the guy's like, well, why did you call it? Like, why aren't you working with that company? That's less expensive. Well, your offerings seemed like they were, you know, broader, they were more intense, they were better. And then the sales guy was like,
Exactly. That's why we're more expensive. So if you want to go from A to Z quicker, if you want to up level your life, if you want to up level your company, then you have to stop playing small. And sometimes that means spending money to make money. I've shared on here that I acquired a business in January and I'm spending a lot of money on it right now. I'm getting in front of the right people. I'm not playing small. It's a promotional products company.
And so I'm getting myself around companies and corporations with big budgets. That doesn't mean that I'm not serving my nonprofit clients and my smaller clients and I'll sell them 500 pens if that's what they need. But my target client profile is far bigger than that, far bigger. They're six figure deals. So the playing small thing is interesting and we all get sucked into the trap.
I mean, many of you have heard it like imposter syndrome, right? You you get in the room and you think you're not worthy or you're faking it until you make it. I can promise you, you're in that room for a purpose. If you were invited to have a voice at the table, then there's something valuable that that person wants. Show up. And you're smart enough to figure out the things that you don't know because no one knows everything. So you say, you have to learn that confidence that you'll figure it out.
And that's the really successful people that talk about fake it till you make it. That's what they're talking about. They have the confidence to understand that they can figure out the solution. They're critical thinkers. And if you, like, let's flip the switch on that scenario. You have an opportunity to do a big pitch, a proposal, or maybe it's a job interview that you feel that
in your head, you would love it's the dream job, but that list of qualifications, you're only checking off a couple of them. So you can either go into that job interview or that pitch and think, yeah, I'm not qualified for this. I'm not going to get the job. And that's what's going to happen. Or you say, you know what? I've only checked two things off of this list, but I'm smart, I'm capable, and I'm exactly what this company needs. And you walk in,
with your head held high, a little bit cocky, a lot of bit confident, and you tell them what they need to hear. You do the pitch. And if they don't hire you, that's their loss. You're onto the next. Great salespeople get that. You offer your services at a price that you are worth. And if they don't buy from you, onto the next. It's a numbers game.
It's totally a numbers game. And I've also shared with you that my first sales mentor said, if you're in a sales slump, you got to go sell something. And that's how you break out of this whole thinking small thing. You can keep thinking small. And if you want to stay small, that's cool. I'm not here to judge. But if you are constantly sitting going, I wish I made more money. I wish I had a better job. I wish I had a better life.
I wish I could travel around the country in an RV. Like you have to be decisive. You have to think big and you have to go. And yeah, some of that takes discipline. I wrote in my email last week about discipline. I am, I struggle with discipline. I'm an ADHD girl. Like rope process drives me crazy. Pick things up, put them down, pick things up, put them down. But we all know success is based on repetition. You have to do it over and over and over again. You, you,
⁓ It's like memorizing spelling words when you were seven. You write them down over and over again. You say them out loud over and over and over again. That's why mantras work. That's why affirmations work. Eventually your brain understands that this is important and it becomes easier and then it becomes the new normal. The same with going to the gym. Did I get up my ass and go to the gym this morning? No, I did not.
Do I know that the only way to get into that habit to go to the gym is to get my ass up at 5 a.m. and go to the gym and do the reps? 100%. So I am guilty of this. I am guilty of it. And so when it comes to this gym thing, I'm playing small. I'm playing small. you know, it's, success is 90 % in your head. It is 90 % in your head. And the rest of it is taking action.
And when I say in your head, it's really this idea that you are worthy of the big things. We're the big things I have right after I finished recording this podcast, I'm going to a pretty big meeting. I'm going to pitch a six figure deal, whether they take it or not. I don't know, but I know that I am the ideal person. One of the only ideal people for this role. have the connections. have the talent.
I've got the experience, the scar tissue as I call it, and they should hire me. And I will take their project that they're looking to build and grow from, you know, where it is now, which is kind of nothing to where it really needs to be an explode. And I'm worth, I'll be worth every single penny that they spend on me. I can't control what they do. I can only control what I do, which is going in there a little bit cocky, a lot of bit confident and
not playing small. And if they don't hire me, then I can follow up. It depends how badly I want it. I'll push for it and I'll keep going. And I will be that relentless salesperson until I get what I want, until I convince them that I'm the answer here. And BTW, this is kind of a sales liaison position. So me following up will be critical to that.
because they need to see that I've got some sales hits by in that.
So back to this, let them wonder thing, because I find it fascinating. And the more that I work with successful entrepreneurs, the more that I understand this concept that perception is the reality, not for you necessarily, not for the person, but for the person viewing you. So we often see people and we think they're wildly successful because they may drive a really expensive car. They may live in a really big house.
only to find out they're millions in debt and they don't have a pot to piss in and they're living paycheck to paycheck versus somebody who lives very meagerly, maybe lives in a studio apartment, drives a 30 year old car and they're multimillionaires.
The same with that person that walks into their room with the head held high, a little bit cocky, a lot of big confident. And you think that they are the bee's knees, like super successful and you get to know them and they're not, they may not have a pot to piss in, but the difference is that person believes that they are going from that not a pot to piss in to really big things. And they'll be relentless. They will be like that salesperson.
who just keeps going because they believe in their capability and they're not playing small. So letting them wonder is a really important thing because that perception is reality in the eyes of others. People wanna work with people who are confident and successful. People wanna buy from people who are confident and successful. They don't wanna buy from people who are wishy washy. They don't wanna connect with people who are wishy washy.
I have a pretty big network because when I walk into that room, I have that energy and people have told me over and over again, as soon as you walked in the room, I knew I was going to like you. I knew that you were a person that I needed to meet because I come in with that high energy, that play big energy. And it's so incredibly important. On the flip side, I can be very intimidating to some people and I've heard that as well.
I've heard that I am incredibly intimidating. I get this in my email. So if you don't know, I send an email out every Monday and Thursday. You can sign up at www.cindy-donaldson.com, scroll to the bottom. And there's a bunch of places to get on the list. And so anyway, these emails go out every Monday and Thursday, and it's all about personal development. I share a lot about my life, a lot of like this kind of stuff. And I got an email back from an individual and she said, I have been
on your email list for years. And I've always been intimidated to reply back and say something. And that kind of like broke my soul in a little bit. And then on the flip side, I was like, okay, I play big. I play big. And sometimes I am intimidating. So I replied to her as like, girl, like I am a human just like you do not be intimidated. And I kind of got into a conversation she had.
I obviously on something in the email that it resonated with her. We had a conversation and I hope she feels now that she could just pick up the phone and call me and we can have a, you know, just a real life chat. And she's local to where I am right now in Connecticut. So if you're listening, I, and you know who you are, I'd love to grab a coffee or glass of wine or something. So the, it's not bad to be intimidating unless you're like a narcissistic asshole when you walk in where that's a lot of bit cocky and not really confident.
So I find those people are really not confident at all. And they have a really low self-esteem and they really don't believe in themselves. And so they overcompensate with this really cocky obnoxious shit. That's not the stuff I'm talking about. A little bit cocky and a lot of bit confident and let them wonder, let them wonder. So what does this like all mean about
like life and getting what you want, it really comes back to your brain and what you tell it. As my mentor always tells me, your brain doesn't know that you're a dirty rotten liar. So what you tell it, it tends to believe, right? It's kind of like what I said about those affirmations. If you say them over and over again, that's what your brain believes. So if you were continually playing small and you were continually telling yourself that you can't do something, you can't afford something, that's what's gonna happen. That's what's gonna happen.
I remember being in a, I don't know, a Facebook group with a bunch of women entrepreneurs and somebody, they were talking about charging for content writing and I told them what I shared and they were just like, my God, like how much, how do you get that much money for an article? And I was like, I ask for it. I'm a good writer. I ask for it. And some people will tell me I'm too expensive. And I'm like, I get that. That's fair. That's fair.
But I have a lot of people who say, okay, she's really good at what she's doing. She does. She understands my industry. If she doesn't understand the industry, she knows how to research the industry. Her content is really riveting and it gets us noticed. There's a value in that. I pay her X amount and from that I attract the right clients and we make more money. So that's my value add. You can go charge $25 for a blog post if you want. And if that makes you happy and you can pump them out. Sure.
But I don't charge $25 because I think big. I think big.
I coach a lot of people who are my age. So I'm 62. I'll be 63 this summer. A lot of them are getting close to retirement. They are kind of, you know, at the end of their career, but many of them don't want to just quit. And so I work with a lot of people who are like, okay, what is next? What is next? And the conversation I have
Immediately is like, listen, you have so much experience and you have so many things that you have learned in your 60 plus years of life. And we dive into kind of what those hobbies look like. What brings you joy? Because when you get to be my age, everything's got to bring joy or it's not on the list. It's not on the list. That doesn't mean that I don't do things that I, cause I have to file sales taxes today. Like that's not something that I love to do, but it's something that I have to do to
do the stuff that I love to do. for me, that's a balance, but I would not be in a job that doesn't bring me joy. got offered, like head hunters contact me all the time and ask me if I'd be interested in being a chief marketing officer, being on a marketing team or leadership team. I'm like, no, no, I don't want to work for the man. That does not bring me joy. Someone to tell me like when I can take vacation. No, I'm a nomad. Like I want to take vacation when I want to take vacation. No.
No, no, no, no, no. So again, it comes back to this playing small thing. So I have these conversations like if you had like your dream scenario, your 60, right? Third trimester of your life, fourth quarter of your life, whatever you want to call it. Like what brings you joy? Let's think big here. And, know, and for those of you don't know, almost six years ago, it'll on July 14th, it'll be six years.
I sold everything in my house, sold the house, kept one car, my Jeep, bought a different RV and Dave and I have been nomads. Right now I'm in Connecticut. I'm in the lower level of my daughter's house. It's blurred out in the back because it's a hot mess. But we, people thought we were crazy. The kids thought we were crazy. Yet a lot of those people that said we were crazy are completely envious. I get all the time, my God, like I'd love to have your life. I'm like, no.
You don't need my life. You need your life. What brings you joy? Let's think big. Let's think big. Do you want to travel around the world? Let's make it happen. I shared in an email, I think last week about the guy Oliver who was 29 years old, has a serious health issue that could leave him paralyzed. He cashed in his 401k, bought a freaking boat, took months remodeling the boat and getting ready and was sailing up and down a river. Never really sailed long distance on the ocean.
and took that boat from Oregon to Hawaii, living his best life, cashed in his 401k. He went all in, like everything he owns, he did in the boat. He could have died in the boat, but he was like, you know what? I'm doing it. I am doing it. I am not gonna work in a corporate job that sucks the life out of me every single day. I'm doing it. He became an internet, you know, an internet phenom. Like all of us were following him and like all of us moms were like, come on, come on, Oliver, you can do it.
He gets to Hawaii and of course they have this big fanfare for him and you know, he's gained millions of followers on social. So I'm sure he's monetizing that. And the last post I saw, he was back in his boat and he's like, I missed my little boat. Like I missed that part of it. He seems like a pretty shy kid, you know, that didn't feel uncomfortable with all the fanfare, very much an introvert. But that's the kind of stuff I'm talking about. Like he didn't play small anymore. He played big and he let the people wonder.
And then all of a sudden that wonder was very much public. So regardless of where you are in your life, regardless, it doesn't matter if you are Oliver and you're 29 years old. It doesn't matter if you're some kid just graduated from high school and maybe you don't want to go to college and maybe you want to get a backpack and travel around the world. Go do that. Time is finite. You hear me say this over and over and over again. You don't know when your time is up.
So to put shit off until tomorrow or to wait until you retire is a mistake. I cannot tell you how many people I have seen who have waited to do things till they retire and then a health crisis happens or they die or their partner dies, their spouse dies, something happens and they don't get to do it. Go live your dream. In a couple of weeks, I'm gonna be hopping on a plane, I'm going to Ireland, my son's getting married.
and he's not marrying an Irish girl. We're the Irish Scottish people. But when they were planning the wedding to have it here in the States, it got really expensive. And my future daughter-in-law said to me, I wish we could get married in Ireland. I'm like, honey, you can get married in Ireland. I'll get on a plane. She was having a small wedding anyway. And some of the family, like she has an aging grandmother who is not going to hop on a plane and go to Ireland. So we're having an event here before we head over across the pond for everybody that can't go.
And that'll be lovely and beautiful. But yeah, you don't play small with this shit. You're call your life. You play big. Go to Ireland. And after that, Dave and I are going to go to we're going to go to the UK. So we're going to Belfast, hop on a plane, go to Heathrow. I'm going to do the London thing because I've never been. So I've got to go do, you know, see the Tower Bridge and Buckingham Palace and have high tea, go to a pub, get one of those cool little taxi cabs. And then we're going to
get a car and then we're just gonna wander around southern England and into Wales. I'm not gonna make any plans after that. We're just gonna drive. There's a few things I'd like to see, but you know, I was talking to a new acquaintance last night who was from England. She's like, you'll find a room above a pub. Don't worry about it. If you don't mind staying in a room above a pub, I'll be like, I live in an RV. I live in a van by a river. I take a shower once a week sometimes. I'm okay staying over a pub. Play big. Let them wonder. So.
I'll wrap it up. Um, and I hope this was like a good lesson for you. hope that you understand that life is finite, that perception is the reality in the eyes of others. So if you are looking to go next level in your business, whether you're a salesperson, whether you're an entrepreneur, whether you are just climbing up the corporate ladder, a little bit cocky, a lot of it confident walk into the room with your head held high and assume that you are getting what you want.
And that's how you play the game. Will you win everything? No. And it doesn't matter because if people aren't willing to link arms with you, they're not the right people. And if you in your soul believe they are the right people, then you become relentless until you get what you want. That's how it's done. So, folks, I am off to a meeting, hopefully to land that six figure deal because I'm walking in cocky, a little cocky, a lot of confident.
and I'm going to tell them why they should hire me. And we'll see what happens. But I'm Cindy Donaldson. I'm the host of the Cindy Donaldson show. If you want more information about what I do and who I am for you and your career, you can go to Cindy-Donaldson.com for your business, whether you want strategic planning, promotional products, marketing website, you can go to Red Barn Consulting LLC.com. For individual coaching, I do take a select few for one-on-one coaching every year.
You can send me an email at cindy at cindy-donaldson.com and we can get on a strategy call to see if I'm right for you and if you are right for me. And if so, we can talk about what that looks like, but go have an amazing kick-ass day. And remember, play big because you only get to flip around this earth once in your life and you might as well make it amazing. Take care, bye.
